I feel...

I am grateful for my parents. I am grateful for my family. I feel grateful for my friends. But…

I feel sad.

I feel sad for my husband that he can’t find a job.

I feel sad for me for not being able to find a steady job either.

I feel sad that the job I love it’s not consistent enough for the lifestyle I want.

I feel sad that we can’t afford our own place.

I feel sad that we are newly married and are in this situation.

I feel sad that our marriage is starting so poorly.

I feel sad that I’m failing at it already.

I feel sad that I work so hard and have nothing to show for it.

I feel sad that I feel useless.

I feel sad that I am so angry.

I feel sad that I spent so much money getting my degree.

I feel sad that we are so financially strapped.

I feel sad that I have to rely so much on my parents for money.

I feel sad I was at the right college for so short a time.

I feel sad that I am stuck while everyone's life seems to be moving forward.

I feel sad for the day when our family wants to go on vacation and we have to say we can’t afford it.

I feel sad we won’t be in a position to have kids for so long.

I feel sad that we have had so many broken promises on jobs and opportunities.

I feel sad that I trust nothing in the plans we make.

I feel sad that I have to pretend everything is great.

I feel sad that I am so disappointed in God.

I feel sad that the church feels the way it does.

I feel sad that I have no drive to go because I am so angry and hurt.

I feel sad that I don’t feel valued by so many.

I feel sad that my age makes me discriminated against.

I feel sad that nothing has changed in so long.

I feel sad that I don’t believe it will get better soon.

I feel sad that I can’t be brave for my husband.

I feel sad that we both are growing increasingly depressed.

I feel sad that where we are, even being newly married, is the worst he has ever felt.

I feel sad when people ask us how being married is and I have to laugh and say that I wouldn’t know because we live with my parents.

I feel sad that my parents want so much for us but are powerless to do anything.

I feel sad.

I feel angry.

I feel angry that I have to stick up for my beliefs so often against the church.

I feel angry that I am viewed as an extension of Thad and not my own person there.

I feel angry that rules should govern my relationship with God.

I feel angry that I can’t convince people of my worth.

I feel angry that I can’t find a job.

I feel angry that my degree means so little yet cost so much.

I feel angry at my husband because he wants to be the provider.

I feel angry at him for wanting to be secluded in his worry.

I feel angry that I never have time for just me by myself.

I feel angry that I have no space to make my own.

I feel angry that I will probably have to live in an urban area.

I feel angry that I care so much.

I feel angry that I can’t leave the church.

I feel angry that my name has to be attached to beliefs I don’t believe in or support.

I feel angry that my friends live so far away.

I feel angry at myself for my health and body.

I feel angry that our honeymoon period could only last our honeymoon.

I feel angry that I don’t have anyone to talk to.

I feel angry that some people are so condescending.

I feel angry that the world can never be supportive.

I feel angry.

I feel hurt.

I feel hurt that my husband won’t talk to me about his concerns.

I feel hurt that I always have to make an effort.

I feel hurt that I am the tag along.

I feel hurt that I can’t be a provider.

I feel hurt that I am by some viewed as not equal.

I feel hurt that I am told to be a follower.

I feel hurt that my skills are often not utilized or not noticed.

I feel hurt that my thoughts are not always valued.

I feel hurt that I feel as though I let others down.

I feel hurt that I try so hard but don’t succeed.

I feel hurt that I am a burden to my parents.

I feel hurt that I snap so often at people I love.

I feel hurt.

I feel confused. I feel cheated. I feel betrayed. I feel stupid. I feel depressed. I feel exhausted. I feel useless. I feel trapped. I feel small. 

I feel like this has been and will continue to be an endless feeling.