Recovery

Sorry i haven't posted lately. But frankly what was there to post other than "I'm miserable." But now i am kinda on the upswing. Other than throwing up my Vicoden meds both yesterday morning and this morning. The meds I've been on make me drowsy and dizzy and tired and depressed and it all just sucks. I have been struggling the past couple days to catch up in my classes. Mostly just 2 and it has been a horrible time. I decided today that for the good of my sanity and health and everything that I just need to drop my writing intensive one. I just can't do it with everything on my plate. I can;'t write a paper by Monday after i just struggled to write one for Wednesday and it just seems too much work for feeling like i do. I think that catching up in my french classes will be better because those professors are more flexible with me turning in things when I can as long as i get them done in the term. And i really like that. But looking at this term and how i feel  right now i think it will take a while to fully feel like myself again. And in the meantime trying to maintain 18 credits is going to kill me.  SO i emailed that professor and told her that I'll be withdrawing if i can't get a medical leave thing. But in the meantime i just feel like i could sleep all day. And pretty much up until now i have been. My throat feels okay when i don't yawn but hurts when I do. So that's a good thing. Dang it not going to think that word anymore because then I do it. So mostly things are okay and I think I made the best decision for me... feels kinda crummy to do it but i think it will be the best plan for me.

I'm not interested in food at all lately. Only trying to force myself does anything. I lost 17 lbs. That's kinda scary. But i guess that happens if you don't eat for 2 weeks...